The Tokyo Report Hello dear readers. It is time for an installment from the capital of Tokyo. And first a bit of background on our wonderful Gov. A man so wonderful, he hates foreign people. What a man. He also hates Blackbirds too. Status of feelings towards foreign food is unavailable as we speak. Many boring news reports etc., etc., about the Blackbird eradication program going on in Tokyo, (you could break a finger and do a bit of research about it you know!), but without exaggeration, the skies are literally full of vermin. Blackbirds, that is, unless of course a foreigner is deported and on the next flight home! So hold on to your hats (hats: A good idea, blackbirds attack and lacerate foreheads, especially children, with their huge talons and beaks. Sorry to be disrespectful of authority, (not a good trait if you want to get along in Japan,) but as we perambulate through our lovely picturesque parks in Shibuya central Tokyo, I can only hear one thing: Not music; unless it is the thumping sound of the occasional trance gig, no it is the continuous unrelenting squawking of thousands of BLACKBIRDS! I am sorry Gov. as I said, no disrespect, but do you remember the softhead in Alfred Hitchcock's movie The Birds? Why do I keep seeing your face in that part?! Back >>